Thursday, August 03, 2006

for the first time, i planted myself on a chair and try to do my literature essay.
and for the first time, i immersed myself in the woes of old age
and for the first time, i truly explored my poems in depth (as compared to the many failed attempts)

and i am greatly traumatised )):

on the way to school today, i met an old man in his late sixies, early seventies. He wore a neatly-ironed shirt, carrying a cloth suitcase. He has a hairstyle of the sixties and it was greyish white. He forced his way through the crowd, hoping that some kind soul will give up their seat to him. He walked past a few njc-ians and no one stood up to give him a seat and guess what were they doing? MUGGING!

it was like a view from the bridge. i see everything from a bird eye's view.
and i am disgusted.

anw, back to the old man.
by the time he squeezed through the crowd, there were two empty seats in front of me. one were taken by a middle-aged man and i stood there, guarding the precious for the old man. He smiled at me once and sat down.

so as i stood beside his seat, i saw his 'wasting skin'. his cheeks protruding and hands as skinny as sticks. he looks happy though. don't know.
somehow, he just seems happy.

and at that point, it struck me. am i going to be like this when i am old?
sagging skin and fragile frame?
that's the inevitable phase in life, isn't it?

"What shall i do with this absurdity-
O heart, O troubled heart- this caricature,
Decrepit age that has been tied to me
As to a dog's tail"

just lonely wait for my endless rest?
argh.

anw, today's hockey was fun fun! haha!
pomp pomp arh!!! :D

strangely, i love studying in TA38 alone. (not during noontime when it's like sweltering hot)
i love the silence, just the sound of the turning fans and the occasional footsteps outside and also the chirping of the birds! ((:
it's quiet. it's serene. it's peaceful to the mind. ((:
somehow, ca6 has just slowly crept out of our lives.

i think i am an evil person.
this heart is deceitful.

haha. sotong ball eye is really cute ((:

i forsee a good week ahead ((: rojak dinner, trio mugging camp! WOOHOO!
i spend all my life with crescent people and i am happy.
at least they release me from my grey agony.
what's fear for old age, when u've suffered nj life.

one more econs essay to go to peace the week.
down with essays.

this j2 life sucks.

oh and the 9pm show sucks. why is that michelle girl forever acting as someone so detestable.
in meteor garden also!!! argh! and this hk drama serial!
can't the tv producers let me like her for once?
but haha! she never gets the guy!!

JEANPOKKK, DONT U DARE SLAP MY FACE!
i curse you to die last! WHAHAHA!
more hair more life ((:



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